Tuesday, November 1, 2011

What We SAY Is Not Always What We MEAN

The last time I goofed up big time and told my Maa, “yeah I’ll listen to your from the next time”, I didn’t really mean it. sure you don’t mean everything you say, right? After all, what’s the fun in saying things if you always mean them? Some little misunderstandings, some nice gossipy details,  a few exaggerations – what’s life without these? So, I thought why not try to put up a list of things that we say but we don’t really mean all the time?

And here is a little intro to this section, from Lewis Carroll –

… `Then you should say what you mean,' the March Hare went on.
`I do,' Alice hastily replied; `at least--at least I mean what I say--that's the same thing, you know.'…

Not really, you see. Sleeping while you breathe and breathing while you sleep is not really the same thing. (I borrowed this example from Lewis Carroll again.)

1. Leave me alone - So the first one is all about the typical Bangali ‘abhimaan’. “Leave me alone” is such an overused term, especially even when we don’t mean it. While we are secretly wishing the person would cajole us, nag us thoroughly till we happily give up and tell them why we are upset, the thing we say so many times during this process is “leave me alone”. I guess it is due to the excessive influence of Bollywood romance in our daily lives that we tend to forget that real life people are not really Raj or Simran who will stick along while we are being stubborn. So, a little uncalled for advice. If you don’t mean to be left alone, don’t repeat it. there are some really strange people around who don’t understand that “leave me alone” means “pamper me a bit more till I give up and tell you all”. Not everybody understands the thin line between anger and ‘abhimaan’!

2. You’re my best buddy – You are no more in school when your bench-mate won’t share their lunch with you if you don’t tell them that they are your best buddy. We have grown up, and some of us have grown tall as well(!!) Then why do we need to assure friends that they are the best friend we have? After all, how do we choose who is the best and who is not? One of my friends is completely opposite to who I am and we share a rapport for over a decade that even our parents fail to understand. And then I have this friend who is so fun to be with that we could spend hours together doing nothing and having fun. Another friend of mine, wherever they are living, we have constant contact and even when we get busy, we make sure to be in contact and share the daily things. Another is my strength to carry on with and in spite of things that happen. How do you decide who is the “best” one? It’s really tough, and also very unfair on the friends who love you so much.

3.  Love you too – Seriously, don’t say it if you don’t mean it. People may get bad heartaches afterwards when you tell them “oh, but I take you just as a friend!” It’s of course very liberal and modern to tell your friends that you love them, but just keep it for the really close ones. There is a fine line between fondness and love, and try to make this distinction. Especially for girls, we say “love you” too often, and may be sometimes just out of habit. But guys don’t really understand the casual “love you” things so well. so if you think this guy has a thing for you and you don’t want to have anything with him – even not harmless flirting – don’t tell him that you love him. Even when he has perhaps saved your life in some way. It’s going to be hard for him to forget your sweet voice ringing with those magical words. (Same here for the guys too.)

4.  Enjoy – I hate it when somebody texts me ‘enjoy’ when I am going for an interview. I mean, who actually enjoys an interview? It’s as bad as any exam, and perhaps even worse! Just the thought of going for a job makes me feel sad 'coz it reminds me that I am growing up. And not just that. Even when people have no clue about what the other person is talking about, they say “enjoy”. It’s become something like a standard reply to anything you don’t understand but feel the peer pressure to reply though.

5. Hmm… - And the three dots. Who invented dots, anyway? You don’t have anything to say, you text “…”. You are sad, you send “…”. You are pensive, you send “…”. And some people send them at the end of every sentence in a text, like “What are you doing?...” What is this supposed to mean, by the way? Don’t you know there are some exact punctuation marks in the use of English language? Even Microsoft Word shows “error” when you type "?" and follow it with "…" . You are angry, you send “Hmmmmmm…”. Why can’t people communicate anymore? Sms charges have reduced, and yet all we get is “…” .

I guess that was enough for a day. If I find any more of these expressions, I will add in another post.

And the reason for which Goddess Saraswati seems to be in my fingers right now is this - 

On my way towards office today, I took 2 buses of the wrong route only to realize just on time that I was on the wrong bus consecutively. Guess I was just too busy deciding who looks hotter - Hrithik or Ranbir!! Anyway, the 3rd time I asked the conductor twice till he threw me a nasty i-am-the-conductor-not-you glance.

P.S. - Somehow, I don't know how, I was not late!! (Phew)


Soumyabrata_exodus_Gupta said...

poignant with a hint of shakesperean drama. real lofty!!!! jokes apart. bangaliana ta ke sholo ana tule dhorecis love it (i suppose i should have written it entirely in English (oops!)but bangaliana ta k bojay rakhlam) :P

Your narrative style was really enjoyable. Fresh minty flavor after a horrible HORRIBLE night (read my fb page to get the reference)

Simantini Sinha said...

@Soumyabrata - Thanks! Lofty bole loft-e tule disni, etai amar pokkhe jothesto!

sunaa said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
sunaa said...

i luv hw you ve craft'd ur words...its so beautiful 2 read!!!

Swarnali said...

LOL...I do have this habit of adding 3 dots to almost everything I type(am not doing it here :P)! But I believe I do it because I think it symbolizes continuity,I mean that your thoughts are still in motion even after the sentence is complete,like in James Joyce's 'Ulysses' (check page 6, there is an instance where he used this 3 dots thing). Sorry,I don't mean to point out mistakes in your post,said it as a matter of fact but yes the "hmmmm..." thing is realy irritating,so is the "enjoy"!!


Simantini Sinha said...

@Sunaa - Thank you!! :)
@Swarnali - Blogs are to share thoughts, so no worries!